God exists, details at 10

If God held a version of the White House Correspondents Dinner, it would probably resemble the Religion Newswriters Association annual meeting. According to Lynn Garrett of Publisher's Weekly, this year's conference featured fiery debates over a number of "hot topics," including "politics, writing for new media, reporting the end of the world, and the continuing growth of megachurches."

I imagine it must be very difficult, from both a newspaper editor and journalist's point of view, to decide the very best way to report the end of the world, a news story grossly under reported by the liberal media. Beyond the run of the mill challenges such as the ethics of quoting unnamed sources and issues of translation, there are problems endemic to the end of the world itself. For example, what biblical passages should newspapers highlight, and how should they be interpreted? Who can newspapers reliably report will be condemned to eternal damnation and who will be exalted to eternal salvation? That's not an area where anyone wants to be surprised.

Of course, the biggest problem for any editor is the headline. My thoughts, free of charge, for members of the Religion Newswriters Association:

FAMILIES TO REUNITE WITH LOST LOVED ONES
LOCATION TO BE DISCLOSED ON JUDGMENT DAY

WORLD WIPED CLEAN
ENVIRONMENTALISTS APPLAUD NEW RELIGIOUS INITIATIVE TO SAVE PLANET

RELIGIOUSLY MOTIVATED VIOLENCE ENDS WORLDWIDE
NON-BELIEVERS RELINQUISH ARMS AND SOULS

HOLY TRINITY PLUMMETS IN POLLS
RESPONDENTS SAY KINGDOM OF HEAVEN 'OVERRATED'

CALIFORNIA BRUSH FIRES DECLARED 'WORST IN YEARS'
SCHWARZENEGGER ANNOUNCES STATE OF EMERGENCY, BLAMES FIRE AND BRIMSTONE

LIBERAL EU GOVERNMENTS OVERTHROWN IN MASS RIOTING
POPE: 'I TOLD YOU SO'

CHURCH, SUNDAY SCHOOL ATTENDANCE UP