A Hurricane of Opportunity

According to my favorite e-source, Hollywood Reporter, the major US television networks are planning anniversary coverage two years after Hurricane Katrina struck the Louisiana coast and devastated New Orleans. Obviously, this should come as a huge relief to anyone who lives in the Gulf Coast states. After all, everyone knows know how ornery hurricanes get when you forget their anniversaries. It's too bad, however, that the networks have only stopped to observe Hurricane Katrina's "cotton" anniversary. They missed "paper" last year and I must say I'm worried they'll forget "wood" (5 years), "tin" (10 years), "soiled, overcrowded public sports facilities" (25 years), the very special "completely gutted inner city" (50 years), and the rarely celebrated but most hallowed "incompetent federal relief agency" (75 years). But really, every hurricane anniversary is special.

Yet I'm a little disappointed the networks are only going to bring us documentaries about the disaster. We already have two 9/11 films, a film about Middle East oil politics, an upcoming movie about CIA renditions, another new release about an FBI incursion in Saudi Arabia, and two major motion pictures about Iraq already hitting the festival circuit. Clearly, the present (or the near past) isn't off limits to Hollywood. So why is Katrina?

Here are my ideas for Katrina based films.

Brownie, starring James Woods as Michael Brown.

A man on the edge. A storm on the horizon. A president who might possibly want results if, really, he, you know, stopped to think about it, um, maybe.

When the FEMA director must make hard decisions, everyone is in the crossfire.

Brownie. Would you take the blame?



When the Levee Breaks

As a hurricane gains speed in the Gulf of Mexico, a young analyst in the Army Corps of Engineers (Jake Gyllenhaal) believes he has detected a fault in New Orleans system. When his superiors refuse to listen, he travels to the city himself to try and warn the citizens before it's too late. Meanwhile, his father (Dennis Quaid), a climatologist at the National Hurricane Center, is unable to convince the president, the Governor of Louisiana, or the Mayor of New Orleans of the imminent threat the incoming hurricane presents.

Together, a father and son must fight to save a city. When no one else will listen, at least they have each other.

When the Levee Breaks. How strong are the ties that bind?

Chocolate City Showdown

Carter (Chris Tucker) and Lee (Jackie Chan) are back! This time they're planning the perfect vacation in old town New Orleans, but things get messy when Hurricane Katrina bears down on the Gulf Coast. To make matters worse, a Chinese mob boss randomly decides to set up shop in the city and kidnaps Carter's estranged sister-in-law. Uh oh! Will Chan's hurricane force punches be any match for hurricane force winds?

Two cops. One hurricane. A whirlwind of excitement.

Chocolate City Showdown. Catch the surge.