Saving the Series: Slush Hour

As loyal readers of Creative Differences know, I occasionally offer advice on how to resuscitate a previously successful franchise that has fallen on hard times. I wouldn't have guessed, but it seems like the most recent candidate for renovation is the Rush Hour franchise. Take a look at production vs. gross for the three films to date:

Rush Hour (1998)
Production Budget: $33,000,000
Worldwide Gross: $244,386,864

Rush Hour 2 (2001)
Production Budget: $90,000,000
Worldwide Gross: $347,325,802

Rush Hour 3 (2007)
Production Budget: $140,000,000
Worldwide Gross: $255,044,035

I'm sure there are a bunch of things in play here that I don't know much about, like inflation, promotional costs, etc. That aside, the net differential between production and gross looks like this:

Rush Hour - $211,386,864

Rush Hour 2 - $207,325,802

Rush Hour 3 - $115,044035

It's hard to argue with the decline between Rush Hour and Rush Hour 2. After all, $350 million is a lot of money. But the nearly $100 million drop in gross between the second and third installments of the series should concern New Line executives. If they want to maintain the same budget, they need to find a way to generate a better return. Would you want to confront Chris Tucker about a pay cut for Rush Hour 4?



As always, Creative Differences is willing to drop some knowledge on the poor, maligned media execs, especially in this time of crisis. In order to figure out just what kind of changes might catapult the next Rush Hour film back into the stratosphere, let's first identify the immovable objects in the franchise.

Front Line Talent

There's no changing the stars. Jackie Chan and Chris Tucker are the Rush Hour franchise and any film will revolve around them. Who else but this duo could thrill and entertain audiences through a series of zany, action packed antics, bringing new life to that favorite trope, "Obnoxious East Meets Shrill West?"


Enemies

The Chinese Triads cause all the world's problems in this series. In the first film they worked with a former British official of Hong Kong to steal priceless art. Then they were part of a major counterfeiting conspiracy in Rush Hour 2. Finally, they attempted to assassinate a Chinese consul to the United States when he threatened to reveal information that would unravel their worldwide leadership structure. If Chan and Tucker kick any ass in the last film, it's going to be Triad ass.

Style

All three films fall into the action-comedy genre. We don't just want an exciting melee between two maverick cops and the most threatening henchmen the Chinese underworld has to offer, we also expect a series of racial jokes that show us no matter how different Chinese and African-American people may seem, they're really just the same. With hilarious consequences!


Fun Locales

Los Angeles, Hong Kong, Las Vegas, Paris. It's safe to say the next film won't take place in Trenton.

(We may seem different, but once you replace the old stereotypes with new ones, we're exactly the same!)

We have the pieces in place, so what's to be done? My proposal . . .

Title: Rush Hour 4: Merry Rushmas
Release date: December 25, 2008

Plot:

'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house, not a creature was stirring not even a . . . Chinese Triad assassin?!? It's Christmas Eve in London and all seems well until an attempt on the life of Jackie Chan's old friend, former Hong Kong Police Chief Qwon, who now heads an international task force to curb the worldwide influence of Chinese organized crime. While it's no mystery why the Triads would want Qwon out of the picture, it becomes clear that the assassin has help from one of Qwon's own bodyguards. With no one he can trust, Qwon looks to the ultimate outsider: his old friend, Chief Inspector Lee (Chan). Lee rushes to Qwon's aid only to stumble upon Los Angeles Police Detective James Carter (Tucker) on vacation in London.

Together, the two must track down the traitor while fighting in a series of improbable battles across London, all of which require Lee to employ innovative martial arts moves and creative use of everyday objects. Meanwhile, Carter -- in a desperate effort to crack the case -- does his best to harass all the women he encounters through a series of lewd and suggestive pick-up lines that would likely be illegal in many countries.

This Christmas, Lee and Carter team-up once again, this time to deliver a royal ass-kicking in the heart of merry olde England! Rush Hour 4, it's time to get medieval -- Kung Fu style!