7. Weekly Plot:
Old Good Guy (OGG) becomes Bad Guy (BG) because he decides system is corrupt, feels he has not gotten his due, or just goes insane. Due to extreme insider knowledge of Institution/Organization (I/O) in which he was leading participant -- thanks to former status as OGG -- BG executes devious plot against which I/O has no good defense. I/O recruits young, spunky Specialist to defeat BG, possibly with the help of Grizzled Outsider (GO) who may also have been a former nemesis of BG. Together, Specialist and GO beat BG and show that his transformation from OGG to BG embodies the rejection of everything he once cherished. Then they kill him.
6. Weekly Trailer:
Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson tramples on T.S. Elliot's grave in new Richard Kelly attempt at cinematic masturbation.
Can you smmmmeellllllll what The Rock's got rhymin'?
5. Weekly Book Release:
Ken Follett proves that 1,000 pages couldn't do justice to the exciting twists and turns that accompany the construction of a 12th-century cathedral. Excuse me, waiter, 1,000 more please!
4. Weekly Bad Career Move:Film columnist Nikki Finke: "All [movie] moguls are morons."
Take a cue from Ms. Finke and work in an industry for which you harbor only contempt. It's the secret to happiness.
3. Weekly Absurd Jacket Copy:
From John Grisham's new novel, Playing for Pizza: "To say that Italy—the land of opera, fine wines, extremely small cars, romance, and Football Americano— holds a few surprises for Rick Dockery would be something of an understatement."
Yes, Italy has indeed always been known as the "Land of Extremely Small Cars." In fact, they have considered etching the slogan into their miniature license plates.
2. Weekly Film Slogan:Sydney White: "Freshman Year Is No Fairy Tale"
Yet somehow I feel the movie ultimately suggests the opposite.
1. Weekly Thing You Need to Know:
Help me celebrities, you're internet procrastination's only hope.
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